Issues

Affordable Housing and Traffic

Austin has a serious problem with both traffic and affordable housing. Property taxes have gone up over half a billion dollars and rent has gone up over 33 percent over the past five years due to the California refugee crisis. That is why we are going to build a dome in order to kick out the Californians and bring both our housing costs and traffic congestion to sustainable levels. Backwards housing initiatives like Code Next will not need to be implemented because Austin will no longer have a migrant crisis by way of Silicon Valley.

Police Accountability, Happy Cops, and Improved Community Relations with APD

Our disastrous City Council reneged on the contract that they designed for APD (a contract that was very unfavorable to our esteemed officers might I add) and as a result we are losing cops to rival cities at a rapid rate. This is why I am prepared to devise a new contract. And that contract comes with flamethrowers.

Furthermore all police officers will be required to train a combat sport (MMA, boxing, wrestling, judo, sambo, muay Thai, or Brazilian Ju Jitsu). We spend over 40 percent of our city's budget on police and we deserve a police force that can protect us under any set of circumstances. We also deserve a police force that can remain calm and composed under any set of circumstances, which is what real Martial arts enable people do. Our police deserve no less than the finest training and our great citizens deserve Happy Cops.

Police sparring sessions (boxing and kickboxing only) will be open to the public and individuals will have the right to step into the ring with our police force at their own risk. There is no better way to foster a healthy relationship amongst the people and police than through this method.

Ending the Drug War

The war on drugs has claimed a plethora of innocent lives and sent far too many non violent citizens to prison for much longer than they deserved. No more. When I become Mayor, we are legalizing all street drugs and controlled substances including but not limited to marijuana. We are going to issue sales taxes on all controlled substances and that tax rate will be dependent on the type of drug you choose to purchase. Crack and Marijuana will be taxed at a rate of 10 percent while cocaine will be taxed at a 35 percent rate. This will ensure that the rich pay their share of taxes. It will also ensure that your property taxes will no longer need to increase since the city will be generating more than enough money through our legal drug market. This practice will decrease the number of inmates, increase revenue, decrease taxes, and improve plans for all city workers-including police.